| 7 habits of highly effective people...... Habit 1 : Be Proactive | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Your life doesn't just "happen." Whether you know it or not, it is carefully designed by you. The choices, after all, are yours. You choose happiness. You choose sadness. You choose decisiveness. You choose ambivalence. You choose success. You choose failure. You choose courage. You choose fear. Just remember that every moment, every situation, provides a new choice. And in doing so, it gives you a perfect opportunity to do things differently to produce more positive results. Habit 1: Be Proactive is about taking responsibility for your life. You can't keep blaming everything on your parents or grandparents. Proactive people recognize that they are "response-able." They don't blame genetics, circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior. They know they choose their behavior. Reactive people, on the other hand, are often affected by their physical environment. They find external sources to blame for their behavior. If the weather is good, they feel good. If it isn't, it affects their attitude and performance, and they blame the weather. All of these external forces act as stimuli that we respond to. Between the stimulus and the response is your greatest power--you have the freedom to choose your response. One of the most important things you choose is what you say. Your language is a good indicator of how you see yourself. A proactive person uses proactive language--I can, I will, I prefer, etc. A reactive person uses reactive language--I can't, I have to, if only. Reactive people believe they are not responsible for what they say and do--they have no choice. Instead of reacting to or worrying about conditions over which they have little or no control, proactive people focus their time and energy on things they can control. The problems, challenges, and opportunities we face fall into two areas--Circle of Concern and Circle of Influence. Proactive people focus their efforts on their Circle of Influence. They work on the things they can do something about: health, children, problems at work. Reactive people focus their efforts in the Circle of Concern--things over which they have little or no control: the national debt, terrorism, the weather. Gaining an awareness of the areas in which we expend our energies in is a giant step in becoming proactive.
One of the best ways to incorporate Habit 2 into your life is to develop a Personal Mission Statement. It focuses on what you want to be and do. It is your plan for success. It reaffirms who you are, puts your goals in focus, and moves your ideas into the real world. Your mission statement makes you the leader of your own life. You create your own destiny and secure the future you envision. Habit 3: Put First Things First To live a more balanced existence, you have to recognize that not doing everything that comes along is okay. There's no need to overextend yourself. All it takes is realizing that it's all right to say no when necessary and then focus on your highest priorities. Habit 1 says, "You're in charge. You're the creator." Being proactive is about choice. Habit 2 is the first, or mental, creation. Beginning with the End in Mind is about vision. Habit 3 is the second creation, the physical creation. This habit is where Habits 1 and 2 come together. It happens day in and day out, moment-by-moment. It deals with many of the questions addressed in the field of time management. But that's not all it's about. Habit 3 is about life management as well--your purpose, values, roles, and priorities. What are "first things?" First things are those things you, personally, find of most worth. If you put first things first, you are organizing and managing time and events according to the personal priorities you established in Habit 2. Habit 4: Think Win-Win Think Win-Win isn't about being nice, nor is it a quick-fix technique. It is a character-based code for human interaction and collaboration. Most of us learn to base our self-worth on comparisons and competition. We think about succeeding in terms of someone else failing--that is, if I win, you lose; or if you win, I lose. Life becomes a zero-sum game. There is only so much pie to go around, and if you get a big piece, there is less for me; it's not fair, and I'm going to make sure you don't get anymore. We all play the game, but how much fun is it really? Win-win sees life as a cooperative arena, not a competitive one. Win-win is a frame of mind and heart that constantly seeks mutual benefit in all human interactions. Win-win means agreements or solutions are mutually beneficial and satisfying. We both get to eat the pie, and it tastes pretty darn good! A person or organization that approaches conflicts with a win-win attitude possesses three vital character traits:
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Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood
Communication is the most important skill in life. You spend years learning how to read and write, and years learning how to speak. But what about listening? What training have you had that enables you to listen so you really, deeply understand another human being? Probably none, right?
If you're like most people, you probably seek first to be understood; you want to get your point across. And in doing so, you may ignore the other person completely, pretend that you're listening, selectively hear only certain parts of the conversation or attentively focus on only the words being said, but miss the meaning entirely. So why does this happen? Because most people listen with the intent to reply, not to understand. You listen to yourself as you prepare in your mind what you are going to say, the questions you are going to ask, etc. You filter everything you hear through your life experiences, your frame of reference. You check what you hear against your autobiography and see how it measures up. And consequently, you decide prematurely what the other person means before he/she finishes communicating. Do any of the following sound familiar?
"Oh, I know just how you feel. I felt the same way." "I had that same thing happen to me." "Let me tell you what I did in a similar situation."
Because you so often listen autobiographically, you tend to respond in one of four ways:
If you're like most people, you probably seek first to be understood; you want to get your point across. And in doing so, you may ignore the other person completely, pretend that you're listening, selectively hear only certain parts of the conversation or attentively focus on only the words being said, but miss the meaning entirely. So why does this happen? Because most people listen with the intent to reply, not to understand. You listen to yourself as you prepare in your mind what you are going to say, the questions you are going to ask, etc. You filter everything you hear through your life experiences, your frame of reference. You check what you hear against your autobiography and see how it measures up. And consequently, you decide prematurely what the other person means before he/she finishes communicating. Do any of the following sound familiar?
"Oh, I know just how you feel. I felt the same way." "I had that same thing happen to me." "Let me tell you what I did in a similar situation."
Because you so often listen autobiographically, you tend to respond in one of four ways:
| Evaluating: | You judge and then either agree or disagree. |
| Probing: | You ask questions from your own frame of reference. |
| Advising: | You give counsel, advice, and solutions to problems. |
| Interpreting: | You analyze others' motives and behaviors based on your own experiences. |
You might be saying, "Hey, now wait a minute. I'm just trying to relate to the person by drawing on my own experiences. Is that so bad?" In some situations, autobiographical responses may be appropriate, such as when another person specifically asks for help from your point of view or when there is already a very high level of trust in the relationship.
Habit 6: Synergize To put it simply, synergy means "two heads are better than one." Synergize is the habit of creative cooperation. It is teamwork, open-mindedness, and the adventure of finding new solutions to old problems. But it doesn't just happen on its own. It's a process, and through that process, people bring all their personal experience and expertise to the table. Together, they can produce far better results that they could individually. Synergy lets us discover jointly things we are much less likely to discover by ourselves. It is the idea that the whole is greater than the sum of the parts. One plus one equals three, or six, or sixty--you name it.
When people begin to interact together genuinely, and they're open to each other's influence, they begin to gain new insight. The capability of inventing new approaches is increased exponentially because of differences.
Valuing differences is what really drives synergy. Do you truly value the mental, emotional, and psychological differences among people? Or do you wish everyone would just agree with you so you could all get along? Many people mistake uniformity for unity; sameness for oneness. One word--boring! Differences should be seen as strengths, not weaknesses. They add zest to life
Habit 7
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power of Positive attitude
The most important thing to do as your begin your new career is to define your attitude towards work. How will it contribute towards your career? How will it add value to your role as a career builder? So, what is an attitude towards career? How do you define attitude? Attitude is defined as
“way of looking at life; a way of thinking; feeling or behaving”.
Importance of positive attitude:
Positive attitude is very important as it will make our life easier. In life , not everything goes as smoothly as we want it to be. There will be times when we will face problems and obstacles.
The most challenging part is not when our life goes smoothly but how we react when we experience problems and difficulties. Treat each failure as a lesson, learn and they will be motivates to achieve the goal. As for those who do not, the positive attitude, they will see problems and difficulties in an entirely different mind frame.
For ex: the situation can be the same for both the guy A guy B , but with the different in mindset, the end result, difference will be very big. Every one of us has 24 hours a day. Since having a negative attitude will eat up ours time, why don’t we just make goal use of the same amount of time to have a positive attitude. Life itself is already hard, it will be much better if we have positive attitude which will make our life happier and easier.
power of positive attitude:
postive attitude helps to cope more easily with the daily affairs of life. it brings optimism into your life, it will bring constructive changes into your life, and makes them happier, brighter ang more succesful. wiht a positive attitude you see the bright side of life, become optmisitic and expect the best to happen. it is certainly a state of mins that is well worth developing and strengthening.
postive attitude manifests in the following ways:
- positive thiking
- constructive thinking
- expecting thinking
- optimism
- motivation to accomplish your goals.
- being inspired.
- choosing happiness
- not giving up
- looking at failure andproblems as blessings in disguise
- believing in yourself and in your abilities.
- displaying self esteem and confidence.
- looking for solutions
- seeing opportunities
A postive attitude leads to happiness and success and can change your whole life. if your whole life becomes filled with light. this light effects not only your and way you look at the world. but also your whole enivornment and the people around you. if it is strong enouhg, it becomes contagious.
Polish professional image to shine in business circles
Clients, superiors, subordinates and colleagues form the key constituents of your work environment. Whether you realise it or not, these people continuously observe your behaviour and form theories about your competence, character and commitment.
And thanks to the ever-flowing grapevine these theories spread throughout your workplace within no time. Thus, your professional image takes shape.
While a positive professional image propels your growth, a negative one mars it. If you have grand career plans make sure you send the right signals across. Want more clues in this regard? Start learning and practising image etiquette. It helps you project the right qualities and characteristics that create a positive buzz about you.
Client impression management: You must understand that every employee is a brand ambassador of the company for which he/she works. Brand represents the values of the company and you must therefore strive to act consistently with these values at all times. With every external contact, you get an opportunity to strengthen your company's brand image and also build a positive professional image for yourself.
So, follow these simple image etiquette tips and create the best possible impression on your clients:
Be punctual: Always be on time for client meetings. Also make sure you honour all your commitments as agreed. Missing deadlines creates a poor impression about you. Under unavoidable circumstances inform the client much in advance about the likely delay and the reasons thereof.
Don't spring last minute surprises because the damage it causes to your image will be hard to undo later.
Return phone calls: Make it a point to return all phone calls and voice messages within a day. In case you need more time to give an appropriate reply, you must inform the caller about it. Call the person and fix another to communicate.
Be polite: Always thank your customers for any response or feedback provided by them. After every client interaction, send a thank you note, even if you don't bag the contract.
This not only creates the right impression about you but also helps you keep the relationship alive. Clients are the people who give you business.
So, always respect their needs and preferences. Complying with client requests in a prompt manner reinforces your commitment to customers and enhances your image in their eyes.
Listen well: You will be able to serve the customer better only when you understand his perspective well enough.
For this to happen you must first actively listen to the client. Never interrupt the client in the middle to spell out your views. Interrupting others is considered a sign of poor etiquette. Wait till the client finishes, to add your comments. Placing others' interest first is an important part of practising good image etiquette.
Take care: Negative buzz or jeopardising labels that convey a skill gap often insidiously derail many a career.
For example labels such as ‘unreliable', ‘disloyal', ‘slow at work', ‘lacks drive' or ‘cultural misfit' can seriously harm your career.
Sometimes you may not know but there is a huge difference between what you think you are and what others think you are.
For instance you see yourself as contemplative whereas others may perceive you to be indecisive!
You must therefore proactively seek feedback to get an idea about the buzz on you. If you see any negative perceptions, work towards changing them. Be willing to make appropriate changes to your behaviour to set your image right.
Here are some more pointers to learn which traits to emulate:
Know priorities: Carefully go through the corporate vision and mission statements to understand the core values of your company. Slogans, taglines and published guidelines on values to be practiced such as integrity, ethics and customer focus throw light on what behaviours to adopt. Similarly, attending training programmes, coaching or orientation sessions is helpful as these reinforce standard behaviours to be adopted.
Know culture: This will tell you about the unwritten norms for success and favourable buzz. Listen attentively to the descriptors surrounding role models, legends and star performers. These tell you enough about what traits get rewarded.
Look up to your boss and other senior leaders in the organisation to pick up image etiquette tips. Their image is definitely behind their success.
Different companies have different cultures. But a good understanding of the image etiquette will help you survive and thrive wherever you work. So, develop image etiquette now. Shaping the right professional image that brings in success becomes easier than ever.
BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!!!Self-confidence is an attitude which allows individuals to have positive yet realistic views of themselves and their situations. Self-confident people trust their own abilities, have a general sense of control in their lives, and believe that, within reason, they will be able to do what they wish, plan, and expect. Having self-confidence does not mean that individuals will be able to do everything. Self-confident people have expectations that are realistic. Even when some of their expectations are not met, they continue to be positive and to accept themselves.
People who are not self-confident depend excessively on the approval of others in order to feel good about themselves. They tend to avoid taking risks because they fear failure. They generally do not expect to be successful. They often put themselves down and tend to discount or ignore compliments paid to them. By contrast, self-confident people are willing to risk the disapproval of others because they generally trust their own abilities. They tend to accept themselves; they don’t feel they have to conform in order to be accepted.
Self-confidence is not necessarily a general characteristic which pervades all aspects of a person’s life. Typically, individuals will have some areas of their lives where they feel quite confident, e.g., academics, athletics, while at the same time they do not feel at all confident in other areas, e.g., personal appearance, social relationships.
7 Ways to Boost Your Self Esteem Quickly
Low self esteem can trip you up just when you need your self esteem is be at its best. These 7 tips will help you feel better about yourself quickly:
1) Think back to when you did something new for the first time.
Learning something new is often accompanied by feelings of nervousness, lack of self belief and high stress levels, all of which are necessary parts of the learning process. The next time you feel under-confident, remembering this will remind you that it's perfectly normal - you're just learning!
2) Do something you have been putting off.
Like writing or calling a friend, cleaning the house, tidying the garden, fixing the car, organizing the bills, making a tasty and healthy meal - anything that involved you making a decision, then following through!
3) Do something you are good at.
Examples? How about swimming, running, dancing, cooking, gardening, climbing, painting, writing… If possible, it should be something that holds your attention and requires enough focus to get you into that state of 'flow' where you forget about everything else. You will feel more competent, accomplished and capable afterwards, great antidotes to low self esteem!
And while you're at it, seriously consider doing something like this at least once a week. People who experience 'flow' regularly seem to be happier and healthier.
4) Stop thinking about yourself!
I know this sounds strange, but low self esteem is often accompanied by too much focus on the self. Doing something that absorbs you and holds your attention can quickly make you feel better.
5) Get seriously relaxed.
If you are feeling low, anxious or lacking in confidence, the first thing to do is to stop thinking and relax properly. Some people do this by exercising, others by involving themselves in something that occupies their mind. However, being able to relax yourself when you want is a fantastic life skill and so practicing self hypnosis, meditation, or a physically-based relaxation technique such as Tai Chi can be incredibly useful.
When you are properly relaxed, your brain is less emotional and your memory for good events works better. A great 'rescue remedy'!
6) Remember all the things you have achieved.
This can be difficult at first, but after a while, you'll develop a handy mental list of self-esteem boosting memories. And if you're thinking "But I've never achieved anything", I'm not talking about climbing Everest here.
Things like passing your driving test (despite being nervous), passing exams (despite doubting that you would), playing team sport, getting fit (even if you let it slip later), saving money for something, trying to help someone (even if it didn't work) and so on.
7) Remember that you could be wrong!
If you are feeling bad about yourself, remember that you way you feel affects your thoughts, memory and behavior. So when you feel bad, you will only remember the bad times, and will tend to be pessimistic about yourself. This is where the tip 'Get Seriously Relaxed' comes in!
Summary
Once you have tried out a few of these, consider making them a permanent part of your life. For most people, good self esteem is not just a happy accident, it's a result of the way they think and the things they do from day to day. Good Luck!
Go with the flow—Change!
Change is an integral part of our life. As is often said, it is the only constant in our lives. Just as change is natural so is our adjustment mechanism. We show a remarkable tendency to adapt to all things that change naturally. For instance, we take all the biological, environment and climatic changes in our stride. But wait a minute…do we adjust with similar ease to all other changes as well? Not quite so. When the changes are caused not by nature but by people we tend to resist them, vehemently sometimes. This is so because we don't want others to pull us out of our comfort zones. The work life changes are a clear case in point. Changes in work schedules, locations, culture, a new job or a new boss, all cause undue anxiety in us. Overcome by anxiety we try hard to resist these changes and stick to familiar ground.
However, like natural changes, corporate changes are inevitable too. Embracing them is essential for your professional growth. Those who fail to grasp this fact and continue resisting will head towards stagnation. On the contrary, those who welcome change are flexible, do better and progress faster. This is often the secret mantra of career success. If you aspire to grow in your career, you must embrace and not resist change. Here are some tips to master the ‘corporate survival of the fittest' formula:
Acknowledge change:In an uncertain business climate organisational growth often depends on changing course as and when necessary. If you must grow along with your organisation, you must acknowledge these changes too. As a first step you must recognise that changes to your identity, relationships and responsibilities often accompany the organisational transition. Only then, preparing yourself emotionally to move ahead in the changed scenario becomes easier.
Think change is good:The organisational change may require you to move to a new location, take on a new role or work in a new setting. Though slightly unsettling in the beginning, all new things help you to grow. They contribute towards expanding your horizons, acquiring new knowledge and gaining new experiences. So, think of change as something positive. Your transition will be smoother and fruitful.
Estimate the scope of change:Whenever you enter a new situation, estimate the scope of change involved. Don't assume things but start finding out the hard facts about the changes taking place. Talk to your boss on how you intend to handle the situation and check if you are on the right track. Focus on both positive and negative aspects of the change. This will help you to be prepared to face the odds well.
Make adjustments:Often changes at work have an impact on your personal life as well. But, if your career prospects are at stake, it is certainly worth enduring little pain. If a new role increases your workload or necessitates you to work longer, you must plan certain adjustments on the personal front too like preparing your family members ahead of time and enlisting addition support and help at home to ease your burden.
Ask for help:At times you may not have all the necessary capabilities to handle change effectively. Then you must display the prowess to upgrade your skill sets to suit the demands. Don't feel shy to seek help from various sources to gain knowledge and insights into the changed role. Find a mentor who can guide you on identifying and acquiring the critical knowledge that gives you the most leverage. Focus on how best you can apply the knowledge gained to meet the new challenges.
Whenever you face the prospect of a major change, judiciously weigh the pros and cons. If there is some thing in it for you, don't hesitate to get out of your comfort zone and embrace it. Remember, to evolve continuously in your profession, you must always be ready to change and go with the flow.
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